Of all the ways to improve your dating life, the most effective, by far, is to improve yourself. It’s not that easy, but it’s really that simple. Better men get better women. Sure, there are exceptions, but generally speaking, if you’re a “better” man, and we use the word better loosely, you’re going to attract, connect with, seduce, and ultimately keep “better” women.
Practical, tactical advice, such as the kind you’ll find in our First Date 101 articles help skew the odds in your favor. “Weird tricks” and expert techniques we’ll reveal in the future can also improve your chances with women. However, nothing compares to the improvement you’ll see if you improve yourself.
What makes a Better Man?
“Better” is vague, and for good reason: what makes a man “better” to one woman may not make him better to another. However, there are a few attributes that “better” men typically have. The more you can improve yourself in these areas, the more likely you are to be perceived as “better”, and the more likely you are to get “better” women.
Better men are more powerful
Power is one of the ultimate aphrodisiacs– it’s why old fat shriveled up world leaders are often seen with bombshells by their side. Power, more so than wealth (though they are intertwined), is perhaps the best non-physical attribute a man can possess, from an attraction perspective.
Being powerful isn’t limited to being a politician, world leader, or even a boss at work; there are many ways you can appear powerful. Some examples include being the center of attention at a social gathering, being an organizer of a social gathering, being a ‘master’ at something (we talk about mastery in 5 attractive qualities that aren’t looks), or even just having tremendous ambition.
Better men are more attractive
It’s far from the be and all and end all, but in the swiping era, looks matter, perhaps more than they ever have. Even prior to the ‘age of superficiality’, men have gotten higher pay and more dates with more attractive women because of their physical appearance.
The good news is when it comes to looks you are not entirely a slave to your genetics. For instance, you can hit the gym, take care of your skin, dress well, and lose excess body fat. Strive to be the most attractive version of yourself.
Better men are smarter
Outside of good health, ten thousand years ago, physical strength was probably the most important genetic trait for survival. Today, it’s arguably intelligence. One doesn’t need to be a genius to succeed in the world today, but most of the realistically attainable high powered careers, as just one example, require intelligence and education. While evolution has not fully caught on yet, women are no fools and they recognize and are attracted to intelligent men.
Intelligence is not only an attractive trait, it’s also a trait that can be leveraged to improve yourself in other ways (such as furthering your ambition, succeeding in your career, mastering a skill–in other words, increasing your power).
Just like looks, you aren’t a slave to your genetics when it comes to intelligence–we aren’t talking about IQ here. Your mind isn’t a muscle, but it can still be trained, and knowledge plus experiences can often be perceived as intelligence.
Better men are more interesting
On that same vein, better men are also more interesting. You can be the perfect guy once you’re in a relationship with someone, but if you can’t hold a conversation, and have nothing to talk about, you’re unlikely to get that far. Fortunately, being more interesting is easy. For example, we wrote about 14 ways to become more interesting here.
Go and be better
Look, most of what we’ve told you so far is common sense. Of course, if you’re “better”, you’ll get “better”. However, it’s shocking how many men think that they are somehow entitled to better women than they currently date without becoming better men themselves. It doesn’t work that way. Put in the effort to be a better man, and you’ll see results. Don’t put in the effort, and you won’t.